By: Isabel Staskiewicz, BA, MSW (in progress)
Is your child struggling with perfectionism in their academic school work, hobbies, or social life? It is so challenging for parents to see their children struggle and feel lost on what steps to take. This can cause both children’s’ and parents’ stress levels to rise. Luckily, there are tools available to help calm these anxious thoughts and create a more relaxed space for your child by using mindfulness tools.
When practicing mindfulness, the focus is to be present in the moment. When anxious or negative thoughts arise, the purpose is not to eliminate them but to accept them for what they are and continue on. There are many different ways to incorporate mindfulness into your life. Here are a few techniques:
- 5 senses technique: This technique is great if you or your child is feeling anxious or overwhelmed. To do this mindfulness technique you will need to sit in a room or go for a walk and name five things you see, four things you feel, three things you hear, two things you smell, and one thing you taste. This allows your child to bring their attention to the present moment and away from the overwhelming or anxious thoughts that are going through their mind.
- Square breathing: In this mindful technique, the participant will practice inhaling, holding, exhaling, and holding their breath in order to regulate breathing. To practice this, your child can trace a square on their arm or leg with their finger as the inhale for one side of the square, hold for one side of the square, exhale for one side of the square, then hold again for the last side of the square. Your child can repeat these steps until they are feeling regulated. This is a technique that I like to recommend for kids to use at school because it can be done discreetly without anyone noticing, which is a plus for kids struggling with anxiety.
- Body scanning technique: In this technique, the participant starts by bringing attention to their feet then work their way up the body to the top of the head. Encourage your child to take time to notice sensations and feelings in each body part. There are many YouTube videos that talk you through this technique if this is a new practice to either of you! This technique is great to use when feeling overwhelmed.
I encourage parents to practice these techniques with their children whether it’s before or after school, during homework time, etc. Not only can these tools be great to help your child with feelings of stress and anxiety but can create a bonding moment, creating a space where your child feels more comfortable to share their feelings.
Isabel Staskiewicz is a clinical social work intern at the Center for Mindfulness and CBT. Isabel earned her Bachelors in Psychology at Michigan State University and is graduating from Saint Louis University in May with her Master’s in Social Work. She has a strong passion for working with children and teenagers, helping to develop healthy mindsets in order to promote success in their futures. Isabel commits herself to the therapeutic relationship, encouraging her clients to be their truest most authentic selves and building self-esteem with clients.
