By Maria Miller, MA, PLPC, RYT-200
According to the National Alliance on Mental Health, 64% of individuals living with a mental illness felt that their conditions worsened around the holidays. So if you’re feeling extra down this holiday season, you’re not alone. Here are three phrases to tell yourself to offer some relief & self-compassion this year.
1. “I’m not alone. A lot of people are feeling this way.” Regularly reminding yourself that you are not alone in your pain is a proven technique to decrease your level of suffering. According to self-compassion researcher, Dr. Kristin Neff, this shared sense of humanity is one of the three pillars of practicing and building self-compassion. Read on for the other two.
2. “I am struggling because it’s the holiday season.” Simply stating what is going on for you is a practice in mindfulness, which is also shown to decrease suffering and increase self-compassion. Mindfulness is the act of stating (aloud or simply in your head) your current experience.
3. “It’s okay to feel sad this holiday season. This too shall pass.” You can customize these words of self-kindness to fit your own heart. What is it that you truly wish a dear friend or loved one would tell you about your suffering? What would speak straight to your soul & heart? This is the step of using kind words, rather than judgmental ones, towards yourself.
You are not alone in your feelings of sadness, guilt, anxiety, or fear this holiday season. You deserve to treat yourself extra gently, bulk up on your support systems, and ride the waves of life until the next season of life. If you are needing extra support, please reach out to us for extra resources, a one-on-one therapy appointment (ask us about our insurance coverage!), or a course. We are cheering you on, and we know this season, too, shall pass.
Maria Miller is a therapist at The Center for Mindfulness & CBT. She specializes in perinatal mood and anxiety disorders, depression, anxiety, emotional intelligence, and trauma. With her background as a yoga teacher and emotional intelligence assessor, she enjoys blending mindfulness & a heart-centered approach with evidence-based techniques to help clients live from their own truth.
